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EFT - Emotionally Focused Therapy

EFT is a powerful modality of therapy developed by Dr. Sue Johnson and Les Greenberg in the 1980's. It is highly structured and consists of key change strategies that have been mapped into 3 Stages and 9 Steps.

EFT helps address the core questions we often ask ourselves about our most important relationship:

"Do I matter to you? Will you be there for me when I need you? Can I feel safe and secure enough in this relationship to be my true self? Can I trust you? Will you value me?"

EFT is evidenced based and very effective in improving communication and relationship satisfaction.

There is a substantial body of research outlining the effectiveness of EFT showing that 70-75% of couples move from distress to recovery and approximately 90% show significant improvement.

EFT is effective with many different kinds of couples including those with partners suffering from anxiety, depression, PTSD and chronic illness. It is effective with heterosexual and same sex couples of all ages and stages of relationship.

EFT Goals Are To:

  • Expand and re-organize partners key responses to one another.
  • Create a shift in partners interactions to one another.
  • Create a secure connection between partners.

How EFT Works

When we can't find a safe, loving way to stay connected to our partner we go into a state of emotional pain and alarm. We automatically respond by protesting or withdrawing (fight or flight) when we feel this fear or panic. Our partner will then often respond with his or her own protest or withdrawal. This cycle is a "neural duet" between partners - they impact each other both physiologically and emotionally creating a feedback loop of negative interactions.

EFT is a systematic map of steps and stages that understands these cycles as the underpinnings of relationship distress. Couples are helped to create nurturance, love and connection in their relationships. Change strategies and interventions are specified within the EFT steps and stages. Couples learn to identify their cycle, the emotions underlying the reactions and their parts in the dance as they come up in the session and at home. Couples learn to regulate their emotions and send clear emotional signals of their needs to their partner. They also learn how to respond in a healthy way to the signals that are sent to them.

Couples begin to actively create a new, positive cycle where they can express their needs and fears and create accessibility and responsiveness. When we can send clear attachment cues we actually pull our partner closer and create safety, trust and support that we have been yearning for. EFT is collaborative, experiential model that encourages couples to be involved in the deconstructing of the negative cycle and the creation of a new, secure relationship.

Reach out today...

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My goal is to help you connect with your partner.
Let me help you create the kind of relationship you have always wanted.

Take the first step... Call 613-848-3683 or email to discuss how you can move forward in your relationship.

Mary Joan Brinson, MSW, RSW is a Certified EFT Therapist in Belleville, Ontario